


Eavesdropping for dummies

by LittleMissKnowItAll



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:33:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23418292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleMissKnowItAll/pseuds/LittleMissKnowItAll
Summary: Eddie overhears Buck talking to Maddie about a certain crush. Cue misunderstandings, oblivious men and an inability to talk about feelings.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 381





	Eavesdropping for dummies

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone,
> 
> First things first: Thank you all so much for your love on my first Buddie fic.  
> Though I let my dramatic side take over for this second one, I hope you'll enjoy it just as much!
> 
> If you have the time (and liked this fic), your kudos and comments mean everything to me. 
> 
> Stay safe, everyone. <3 
> 
> Oh, if you like my style and have a fun little prompt: hit me up and I'll see what I can do.

It's a little after eleven when Eddie finally gets home after one of the longest shifts of his life. At least, that's how it feels right now, sore feet dragging him towards his front door. Today's weather had been horrible, the calls numerous and, yeah okay, he wasn’t above admitting that he missed his best friend.

Luckily, said best friend was currently inside his house watching Christopher, so the day wasn't a complete disaster. He wouldn’t bother Buck with work-talk though! …Well, okay, maybe just that one bizarre confetti-related fire they’d had to take care of a few hours ago.

Closing the front door quietly, Eddie takes of his shoes and makes his way into the kitchen. Apparently, Buck hadn't heard him come in as he seemed to be engrossed in a conversation on his phone. Right away, Eddie knows Maddie is on the other end. Smiling as he thinks about the strong bond between the siblings, he continues towards the kitchen, only stopping when he hears something eerily similar to his name slipping from Buck's lips. Turning around to say hello, he notices Buck is still on the phone and fully unaware of Eddie’s presence. For some reason, Eddie can't help but stay there and listen, needing to know the next words out of his best friends mouth. 

"We're not having this conversation again, Maddie." Buck says, dragging a hand down his face. He sounds tired, so very tired. "Please, can we just not talk about my feelings for him for one day? …No, I know, you're my sister and teasing me is part of your job description." He says, nodding into the phone at whatever Maddie keeps saying. Though he seems tired, according to his tone there has to be a smile on his face. It might be small, but Eddie can still hear it in his voice. 

As soon as Buck opens his mouth again though, Eddie knows something has changed. It's like the room has become a tiny bit colder. "You know I sometimes wish I could go back? I mean, I love all of this, being here, seeing Christopher grow up. But I just wonder where I would be if I’d never met them…or at least kept my distance.”

He sounds so sad and Eddie feels his heart break a bit, feels his legs wobble as he tries to understand Buck's words. It feels like an eternity before Buck sighs, opening his mouth again and Eddie would pay good money to know what Maddie was saying.

"Yeah...Yeah, you're right. I know you're right, okay? Of course I don't ever wanna lose them. Doesn't make things any easier though." He sighs again and Eddie has to use all his willpower to stay frozen and not tackle the man into the bone crushing hug he so desperately seems to need.

"I..I gotta go Mads, Eddie's gonna be home any second and I don’t want him to..." He drifts off and though Eddie can hear Maddie saying Buck's name on the other end of the line, neither him nor Buck answer her.

Because as Buck was talking, he'd grabbed his plate and gotten up. And in doing so, had spotted Eddie eavesdropping. Shit!

Buck manages to walk a few steps, ending the long forgotten call without looking at his phone before pocketing the traitorous device. For a second, Eddie fears Buck’s going to drop the plate he's holding in his wildly shaking hands. As if Buck seems to notice the fear, he looks down at the plate in his hand, seems confused for a moment before placing it on the dinner table he's now standing next to.

“When a…when did you get home?” Buck tries, but there’s nothing casual about his tone.

Eddie looks down, trying to decide if he should lie or just come clean about eavesdropping on basically the whole conversation. As he starts spluttering out a reply that seems to be a bit of both choices, Buck holds up his hands, silencing Eddie instantly.

"Eddie, I...I'm so sorry! You definitely weren’t supposed to hear that. I was just…shit." Buck continues, eyes huge and face going white as a sheet. His shoulders sag, eyes now focusing on his own shoes and Eddie can't help but feel his heart break a little at the defeated impression the other man makes.

"Hey, It’s okay. Buck, come on. Look at me." Eddie tries, voice soft as he takes a step closer...which turns out to be a mistake. Buck instinctively backs away from Eddie, taking one, two, three steps backwards until his back almost hits the wall.

"I gotta go. I'm...I'm sorry, Eddie" He rambles as he starts walking away, flinching as Eddie puts a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to stop Buck from fleeing. Though he stops moving for a second, he doesn’t turn around. "Please, Eddie. I can’t do this right now. Please, just let me go.”

And Eddie does. Not because he wanted to, but because of the way Buck's voice broke on his name. So he just stands there, watching Buck make his way over to his car, not once looking back at Eddie. As he watches Buck's car drive away, he breaks down. He’s not really sure why, but he can’t hold back the sobs, his legs giving way as his heart breaks, Buck's words echoing through his mind on loop. He manages to close the front door just in time, his body sliding down it until he's sitting on the floor, utterly defeated, sobs wracking their way through his body. 

They had been friends, good friends, for a little over two years now. ...And Eddie'd been in love with Buck for a little less than that, but not a lot. He'd never said it out loud though. Not because he was ashamed of his feelings, but because he was afraid of what would happen. Eddie'd been married before, Eddie had a kid, Eddie's wife had died...and those were just three of the suitcases full of baggage he would drag into every relationship from now on. Though he loved his son more than life itself and knew Buck felt the same way, there was a difference between the son of your best friend and the son of your boyfriend. He just couldn't ask that of Buck. Could he?

He doesn't know how long he sits there, now all cried out, trying to get his breathing under control. All he knows is that he feels soulless as he gets up, feels like he can't do anything else but sleep. So he locks the front door, turns off all the lights and, with one last glance at a soundly sleeping Christopher, makes his way to his bedroom. Sadly, sleep doesn't come for him. 

The next morning, he calls in sick. Though Bobby doesn't call him out on it, he seems to sense there's something up. "I'm here if you want to talk, Eddie. About anything. I hope you know that". Thanking Bobby, Eddie hangs up before rolling over, groaning as he remembers he should get Christopher ready for school. As always, the little boy's smile manages to make his heart feel less heavy and he smiles back at him over breakfast. 

After dropping Christopher at school, all his plans fly out the window. He’d wanted to give Buck his space, but he also knows how the younger man's brain works. Which means that right about now, Buck is making plans to leave the state. Okay, maybe nothing that drastic yet, but he is definitely overthinking everything. And as someone who's spent a lot of nights doing just that, including last night, Eddie knows he has to man up and go talk to Buck. Even if the conversation doesn't go in the direction he wants it to go. Even if it means he'll lose Buck as a friend. 

The walk from the car to Buck's door seems to be longer than usual, his feet dragging like they’re made of lead. Though he knows that this is the right thing, that they have to finally have this terrifying conversation, he can't help but long for the safety of his dark and lonely bedroom. 

He'd thought about texting Buck, letting him know he was on his way. In the end, he'd decided against it. 

So he knocks, hoping Buck's at home like he usually is on his day off. As it stays quiet for a second too long, he starts to wonder if Buck fled the apartment and is hiding out at Maddie's...or worse. No, he wouldn't really flee the state, would he? Could he?

Luckily, Eddie's brain doesn't get to spiral for too long as the door finally opens a bit, revealing a tired looking Buck.

“Why are you here?” He sighs, momentarily looking up at the ceiling. Looking back at Eddie, Eddie notices a weird look in Buck’s eye. He knows this look, has seen it before. It’s Buck’s armor. Armor he should never be wearing, least of all when talking to Eddie.

“Can I come in? Please?” He pleads, really not prepared to have this conversation out in the hallway. As Buck keeps his eyes trained on a spot behind Eddie’s head, he tries again. “Come on, Buck. We need to talk about this.” As he says the word ‘this’, Eddie waves his hand between the two of them.

For some reason, this seems to dent Buck’s armor as he huffs out a breath, before opening the door wider and stepping aside to let Eddie enter the apartment. Though Buck’s jaw is clenched in a way that almost looks painful, Eddie counts being let in as a win as he walks further inside, stopping in the open space next to the staircase.

He stands there for a second, looking back at Buck who stays at the door for a moment longer before finally walking over to the kitchen area. Opening the fridge, he calls over his shoulder. “Want a beer? ‘Cause I’m sure as hell gonna need one.”  
Though he doesn’t say it in a joking way, it seems to lift the mood in the room considerably and Eddie can’t help but smile at the hope he’s feeling.

“Yes please, you know how good I am at talking about my feelings.” As Buck turns towards him, he makes a slightly silly face, before taking the bottle from Buck’s hand. It seems to work, as Buck cracks the smallest of smiles, taking a large gulp of the beer. Swallowing, he sets the bottle down before leaning against the kitchen island, crossing his arms. Clearly, part of the armor is still there.

Eddie waits for a second, for some reason hoping Buck will be the first to speak. When he doesn’t, Eddie nods to himself before taking one last sip and setting the bottle down too.  
“Okay, so…I don’t know what happened last night and I want to honestly kick myself for letting you walk away.” Eddie all but blurts out in record time. He shakes his head, chewing on the inside of his cheek for a second before finally catching Buck’s eye. Though it’s like his heart is beating in his throat, he can’t stop, won’t stop talking. He needs Buck to understand.

“I should have stopped you, should have…I don’t know…forced you to talk to me. But I didn’t…and I don’t know why, really. All I know is that I’m sorry.” With that, he throws up his hands slightly, looking down. He doesn’t really know what else to say now. He knows what he wants to say, what he’s been meaning to say for months now. He just doesn’t know if Buck wants to hear that right now.

It’s silent for less than a second as Buck shakes his head, arms dropping down to his sides as the confusion at this conversation is clearly displayed on his face. “Wait, what? I don’t…I’m pretty sure I should be the one apologizing. I mean, I’m the one that fucked this up. Again.” He laughs, though there is no humor in it. Hearing that sound pushes Eddie into action, stepping closer to the younger man. There’s still enough room between them, but he’s pretty sure Buck isn’t going to run from him. Not this time, he won’t let him.

“Buck,” Eddie breathes, itching to reach out and touch the other man’s arm, shoulder…neck. “You have nothing to apologize for and you definitely didn’t fuck anything up. I almost want to say that we should just forget about last night, ‘cause I can’t stand you looking this broken.” As Buck looks away, Eddie takes another step closer. He doesn’t reach out, not yet, as Buck stares at him.

With a small smile, he takes that one last step he needs to finally, officially, be inside Buck’s personal space bubble. “But if I’m being honest, I don’t want to forget.” Finally, Eddie laughs, a soft but honest laugh as he reaches out his right hand, softly holding onto Buck’s upper arm as he continues. “We are idiots. No, don’t... We are and you know it.” At this, even Buck lets out a confused chuckle, unsure of the direction Eddie is heading. “Look, I know last night wasn’t how you were planning on telling me, if you ever were. But can we please, finally, talk about this?”

An eyelash flutter, a head tilt, bottom lip tucked tightly between his teeth, Buck finally speaks. “I thought we already were?” Slowly, but surely, Buck’s confidence is growing. Finally, he’s catching on. And Eddie can’t help but smile.

“Well, I certainly was. Care to share your thoughts on the matter?” 

And Buck laughs, mostly as a way to relieve the tension from his body, from his soul, as he stares at Eddie. “Eddie, I…I mean, you know how I feel. About everything.” He huffs and there’s that hand again, dragging its way down his face before it drops back down.

“Still” Eddie says, his hands slowly sliding down to stop at Buck’s wrist, thumb rubbing over his pulse point. “I’d like to hear you say whatever you’re feeling to me. You know, when I’m actually supposed to hear it and not while I’m sorta unintentionally eavesdropping.”

Staring down at his arm, seemingly hypnotized by Eddie’s fingers slowly moving around his wrist, Buck lets out a slow breath. “…I love you…” Though it’s soft, barely above a whisper, Eddie hears. He hears the words, feels the words, lives off of those words as his face splits into a wide grin. He drops Buck’s arm and for a second, the fear is back in the younger man’s stance. As Eddie moves his hand towards Buck’s neck though, thumb tracing his jawline softly, the fear ebbs away.

“See”, Eddie says, noses almost brushing now, “told you we were idiots.” With that, he closes the gap between them. As their lips brush, Buck’s hands find their way to Eddie’s hips. Nothing has ever felt this right.

Breaking apart a few seconds later, already breathless, Buck can’t help but laugh as he drops his head. “You know what, Eddie? You’re right. You should have been the one apologizing.”

Confused, Eddie stares at him, his satisfied grin never leaving his lips as he holds onto Buck’s neck. Smiling, Buck pulls him close again. “Instead of doing this, I spent the last 20 hours thinking you hated me. Thinking I’d fucked everything up.”

Smiling, Eddie rubs his hand through Buck’s hair before sliding it back down Buck’s neck towards his shoulder. “I’m sorry.” He says softly, squeezing Buck’s shoulder. “Oh, also…I love you too. Not sure if I’d made that clear yet, so.” With that, he claims Buck’s lips again. 


End file.
